Almost every witch in service of their community eventually has to deal with matters of the heart. Love spells and similar workings have come under a good deal of scrutiny as unfair or unethical. I prefer not to get into such debates, and let the Spirits decide on a case by case basis. Many witches, like myself, take this road so as to be neither arrogant and rigidly self righteous, nor overly flippant. Along the way, we find efficient ways of divining what to do.
In some streams of Vodun and diaspora faiths, the Orishas in charge of whether or not people will get together, have sex, or be a couple long term are Eshu, the Ancestors, and Oshun. Eshu opens or closes the way to anything. the Ancestors determine whether or not people will breed or do the acts related to it anyway and Oshun decides whether or not a relationship can be romantic and joyful. So my efficient way of diving whether or not to even go there, I call the 15.50 reading. It’s three coins whose monetary value adds up to 15.50 NIS. Each coin was consecrated to the relevant Orisha, and gives their yes or no vote on a relationship. Who says yes or no determines whether they should continue to pursue that relationship, and whether or not a working would be helpful. Well, that’s the simplest explanation anyway. Who says yes or no also says what may be going on in that situation.
I am permitted to ask three and only three questions of these coins for each case. The third I always save for after the working has been completed, if one was done. The first two are: “What is the situation now?” and, “What would the situation be if we give offerings to (whoever said no)?” The second question, I only ask if Eshu and at least one of the others said yes.
A rare few times in my work, I’ve gotten Eshu-yes, Ancestors-no, and Oshun-yes, and then the second question gets 3 yesses. When that happens, I know it’s time to follow up with the bones because it’s a clear indication of a family curse, or a similar issue.
Some family curses are pretty explicit. Until very recently in history, most cultures didn’t believe in the sins of the father not being passed to the son, so to speak. One bad apple spoiled the whole bunch, and if there were more than one, well that just proved it. So when a member of a family did something particularly horrid, someone might curse them and their entire family and line.
In some cases, the families did not survive for the curse to be passed more than a generation or two. In others, some must survive in order to amplify it to its full misery. So they go on, but every generation plays out its horrifying destiny.
If or once the curse is known, they can do things to break it, but this often requires great expense and great change that is harder to manage than the expense. It is manageable though. In many cases, the reaction to the curse was denial, and future generations may never know their family had been cursed. Even from a merely psychological standpoint minus any mysticism, one can understand how this could wreck a future. There is this negative message lurking in the back of their mind that they can’t even articulate, but it affects their lives and behavior.
The Well Intentioned Curse
Mankind’s history is plagued with conflict and wrought with traumatic changes. It is understandable that, in light of how tough it is to stay alive, someone would attempt to make things easier by blessing a family, a child, or a newborn with their good intentions. Sometimes various protections are placed, and the person bestowing the blessing doesn’t think about what things may be like in the future. Sometimes they do, but they consider some things a fate worse than death.
Someone may bless a child that they and their line will never experience poverty but what if at some point wealth corrupts them? They may be blessed to find a wealthy spouse, but then what if that spouse beats them? What if somewhere down their line, the best partner for one of their descendents happens to be a “starving artist” who makes them happy, but is just low on the cashflow?
Various wars, invasions and imperial campaigns led to protections against people of the offending ethnicities. There are many people today who, the female members of their families cannot hold a relationship with an Italian because of the Romans, or a Nordic person because of the Vikings.
At the time, many blessings and protections seem like a good idea, but people should be careful what they wish on another person.
Breaking the Curse
Because our position has been so misused, it is a very delicate matter to inform a person that they or the person they love are under a family curse. This is one reason I do photos and videos of readings. Someone should be able to get a second opinion, and see that I am not trying to scare them into compliance. I tend to be very blunt though, and have built a reputation as a straight shooter. If you are the more gentle type, you may want to give them the information without actually saying “curse”, or to offer them the kind of help that would solve the situation without using the word. They don’t have to know that the ingredients in the incense are to break a curse rather than merely to ward off negative energy.
Mind you, some family curses are still active because they are still relevant. Follow your divinations to the letter in these. If the Spirits say don’t touch it, then don’t touch it. If they give you an out or a way to manage the situation, follow what they say.
Sometimes you may be dealing with some very old witchcraft, or things from a culture you are not familiar with. The Spirits will lead you in the right direction regardless, so do what they say even if it means stepping a bit outside your comfort zone. If you need help, then get it. Sometimes you may need to consult or outsource to someone with greater expertise. If something may be required that is too far out of your comfort zone (like you’re vegan, and the breaking or protection or updating the protectors to not be so protective requires animal sacrifice) simply decline the work. If you can’t handle it, then it’s better to pass it than to do it wrong, in these cases.
Most of the time, in the case of a well intentioned over-protection, things have gotten out of hand because the spirit warriors who actually do the protecting have not been given offerings for generations. So their energy bridge is weak enough that some connection may happen between people who aren’t allowed, but then the connection will ultimately break or at least conflict will form because of the remaining barriers. The thing to do in that case is usually to update the warriors. The offerings need to be refreshed and their mission updated, or they can be released. It depends on what your divination tells you.
In summary, sometimes you may get a case of family curses or over-protections that you will have to deal with very carefully. Don’t just follow a standard procedure. Use your divination tools, and go with the guidance of the Spirits.